Requiem For A slot Attendant

he fortified the genome with chewing tobacco and matchstick filings
making mouths stronger, more resistant and inventing floss in one fell swoop
and a fell swoop would, no doubt have been felt, had he ever chosen to swoop

thankful we are then, that he did not and chose instead, to live out his twenty five latter
working years as a slot attendant at Great Yarmouth's 'Bonanza Bill's' and later, 'Bed-rock Betty's':
the preponderance of B's always as much a mystery to be chewed upon as was the seeming

fascination of punters, as he came to call them, with bingo, shove a' penny and the one armed
banditeers which, as he also came to understand, were the 'bed-rock' for Betty and put the wind
in the sails of bills 'bonanza' 42 footer. The same one that washed aground off Northern Italy in '86 -

but that is to digress from the requiem that is this:  A Slot Attendant also known as: Big Jim. died
12th January 2013, leaving behind two children, Jim and Amy and an estranged wife. RIP Big Jim.
You will be sadly missed - reads a plaque at Potter Heigham remembrance gardens - The Slots.

HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR NETWORKING: GET OUT OF THE RESULTS ORIENTED MINDSET

- ok?

just do that.

stentor violin 3 4

up here
its flash
make to mention
eruditeness
pay homage
and do my job for me
I cant speak
and have slow wit
take a phone call
no stage
- dry rot.

http://theconversation.edu.au/we-were-wrong-imf-report-details-the-damage-of-austerity-11533

...caught between altruism and anti-trust, our adaptive expectations have risen as IMF indicators are auctioned like aid. Our monopsonic multipliers and money illusions have created a modern portfolio theory but we need a new Marshall Plan. The misery index has ceased to move and points mutely at: "Mean"... Tiger economies and treasury bills transfer tangible assets and trust at the same trough. "We Were Wrong" price hiked, populated and privatised. PFI.

Shirkers and Workers

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jan/08/welfare-problem-real-scroungers-greedy

COMMENT:

·  It is true that bookies target low income areas. That those areas are inhabited by 'the unemployed' is one of many assumptions implicit in the conclusion that 'the unemployed have too much'. More logical assumptions might be : People in low income areas are less likely to make successful planning objections against bookmakers; people in low income areas have higher levels of dissatisfaction rendering them more likely to gamble; people in high income areas prefer to travel to place bets; people with too little money don't bet or even: bookies are taking advantage of low rents in poor areas, inhabiting, typically, ex public houses which were one of the last bastions of local communities and neighbourhood cohesion. BUT NO. Because Redwood is a TWAT like all the rest of them.....

The Tories' conclusion: 'people in low income areas have too much money' - brilliant! Delighted that this is geing highlighted more often and more effectively - the biggest lie on which all the bullshit and gross larceny is predicated. 

Unprintable:

Even Before Smileys were invented, how I wished I could have facially engendered
a semi-colon of my own amberlithic alteration... The dimensional stability of the Drop-outs had reduced by a halftone during the Duotone, but I will wager more than a film coat that this final flood will be the fixer and final count.

Nothing Today, Maybe Tommorrow...?

Except that i have to take this daughter in morning
for an early language test - there is nothing:

 Before even Smileys were invented, how I wished I could have facially engendered
a semi-colon or my Amberlithic alteration. The dimensional stability of the Drop-outs had reduced by a halftone during the Duotone, but I will wager more than film coat that this final flood will be the fixer and final count.

I am all testicles and you, the one fart, amnestied like vultures over Tin roofs in Rotherham.
Come and get yer dinner. Mastic Vutures at that. Politically vile, Knobby's nuts.
#Trending. Ballistic cough medicines. Leather sofas and ice on the wood floor
I want to paint some more. See you Richard, Dick, see you looking back at me -

In this alone I am opprobrious, maladjoined, incantense
A hearse would loumber off the shollywoulds at nankings
garden. Mrs Arden, who waits year round for just such opportunities,
Unbeknown to her feral un-conscious has no re-call at all.
Thank God. Afterwards: Make Milwall Hammers, fight outside HMV
Read a pink paper and foliage onwards... mesoptamian hampervfest.

a shed is not all its knocked up 2b

confounded shed architects death remorse gypsum note

If I didnt have a shed
everything would be different
my bikes and others,
which I had rightfully stolen would
be there, awaiting my touch
 because I am sensitive when it comes to bikes.

Alas

vaingloriously,

I got a shed and -
horror of horrors -
I put a light in it.

No more cycling for me.
The end is in sight
My shed. Damn that construction
of iron and SHEET glass

no more innovations required.
A shed has ended my life.

Ah

A Requiem For A Slot Attendant

Bare Naked Ladies

Living close to Graham Linehan (Author of Father Ted; I T Crowd etc.) so close that I see him quite regularly in the street has made me feel that writing a successful TV Situation comedy is entirely achievable. I have therefore and forthwith come up with this list of possible situations:

Possible Situations List: 

An ice rink

A bowling alley

A firm of telephonists

A garage

A French Holiday Campsite (where the French are represented as aliens)

A Tank

A pair of picture framers with aspirations to be artists working in a remote barn(!)

The Counseling Dept of A University

A Daycare Centre

A Taxi Office (this has been done quite successfully in America)

A War Torn Far Flung Place (Ditto)

A Cowshed -?

The Personal Training Dept of a large health and fitness conglomerate

Corporate Strategy (2012 sorted this)

A Co-operatively (ish) run Indoor Flea market - “Nooses”?

An Antiques Dealers Warehouse

A Tea room.

The Garage is underlined because I can best imagine the stuff that goes on there and I like the idea of having pictures of naked ladies on the wall on the telly. (if I was really boxing clever - I'd make them into characters in themsesves and they would come OFF the wall, interacting with the mechanics in ways of my imagining...mmm) (fade to me writing furiously...)))  TTHHEE GGAARRAAGGEE,,,,,

a man in blue oil stained overalls sits with his feet up on a table sipping from a cup which, when he replaces it, shows (C/U) signs of quite big microbial life. He is staring at a picture of a topless young woman. As he replaces his cup, the young woman steps out of the picture and into the room, still naked and holding a bunch of keys:

Naked Lady: "......?

MMmmmmm - this could work.

 

Suck That Fucking Marrow Now

I wish I had the ability to explain the inexplicable bits of me that upset the bits of you that dont understand the bits of me that are appearing to be restraining themselves from murdering (all bits of) you whilst those same bits are telling you it's all because I'm your dad - or something. But, I can't. Just notice the date, remember you were still a kid, just - ish and remember the first few days you came HERE after being THERE at mums after she came back from WILTSHIRE - where Merlin is from.

That's Magic, said Paul.

No it isn't it's dedication and hard work said Zebedee.

The Audience.

This reader saw me in Morrissons at the checkouts. I caught him staring at me in thrall to something...

Then he just looked away, disinterest etched.

It was beautiful.

Mixed Up (only half hidden) letters to the Pro Genie

The Narrative: (“”):

“at least I loved you and I never ran away from you. You’ll never have to lionize me or force yourself to make up stories and scenarios to disguise the fact that I have given up on you. I never gave up on you and I’m very proud of you. I think you are all the best bits of me (cliché I know) wrapped up. Obviously you are the bad bits of yourself – but that’s your problem.”

The Speech:

This is EMOTIONAL writing baby.

Half hidden and mixed in it’s metaphors, genres and idioms – it’s mixed up writing and all the more for that.

“Said Alice”.

what is my son missing by not being with his friends on x box?

answers all here - roll up - it's so easy
roll up roll up and sorry to disappoint
how many p's are in a point?
roll up - sorry - I'm only googling
John.

(SOMEBODY stole Hitlers dog - I'm just calling the RSPCA - early)

(I'm only dancing)

impoverish

mean time
we have

short horror thing

i am in front of a shallow box
you are too

wraps lee

remember wading birds, your favourite Blue Peter episode, and

remember Keats