Oh Capitalise!

 Chorus:

Warm wind rushes at the dog walkers and dries

Before fuss can be made, brightly, as if new -

They will walk past the fuss factory like Lowry babes

But for now, they are mute. What to do?

-

Keep your head down, keep your distance

Don't give in to final demands or insistence

There are people in the Social Club, never been before

The enemies are closer than the green lit exit door.

-

Those were the Days Of Roses

 I saw the chrome plated cast of a blob in the corner of the bathroom on top of the toilet brush handle and I remembered that we were all locked in now. All of us finding pleasures and treasures in the simplest of things if we didn't live in the North where the offies closed at ten.

Second verse.

Third verse.

Then we were all in it together again. The speakeasies in Hethersett, Wymondham and Frome were begging askance of R numbers; there was poetry in the air amongst the dogshitbins where the virus must thrive and the security guard in Tescos can't.

Chorus

Some cat plonked itself down on my legs as I was in a house. Fireworks still going off in the blackness of another social media night, not even scaring the hounds, let alone the pussies. A child with an angry father has used his only recourse to justice on a teacher who has seen it all before. 

We are all equal in the eyes of the dogshitbins.

Thous and Thoses

 I need to be here for me

cant be there for you

can hear me calling

what do you want

You?

Me?

Where will it all end?

 only got a min

Dunn's River

I see

all of the girls

go out

high on the happy bombs 

-

I'm only

21

But I

Know where the blast came from

-

When boys

came here to pay

the debts

of mascara's bombs away

-

I heard 

my father call

to them

as they shot him by the wall

-

Newspapers

did report

a man

killed right here in Treport

-

Now all 

the friends are gone

six years

is all that they have done

-

I buy

in this small town

my meat

from men who gunned him down

-

And ev-'ry

one will know

No good

can come from saying so

-

So I

eat no more meat

than I

find in this old dark street

-

smoked sal-mon

haddock fillet

Sweet cured

Smoked mackerel sweet with bay

-

Dripping

Pork shoulder steak

Tesco's

spicy minced lamb's liver bakes

After The Facts

 Nothing is coming to the boys in the hats 

 and there are no rewards for what they did and that 

is a fact, you know that is a fact.

Like a d day dodger or the girl who failed her sats,

there are no rewards for what they did and that

is a fact my friend, that is a fact.

You try to do what you can do no more

and you're responsible for the company but you also lost the score

and that is a fact. That is a fact.

The sentinels in their rented hells have gone away with vented smells and

blamed you for all the rise and fall of dividends and it's backs to the wall

and that is a fact. That is a fact

(Well there are facts and there are figures and there's rhyming slang and

Gold diggers - and they're all after the facts, my friend, they're all - 

after - the facts.)

ends

Rap Parke Ya got Books

 well you been singin in the company of the corporate wanna say I

but the names and the faces that you answered to - they died

dont  think they lasted 21 nights before the last one left

Well  you're writing your letters in your quote marke best -

You got your folding bookshelves and your karl marx tests

but you know you're only half alive because of the old mans vest

you remember every novel like it was cool to be cruel to be hip

but you got no game shot dice, you cant roll them round your top lip

and the toffee and the coffee  and all of the party wines

tell you that no-one is late or on time. you got competition after repetition,

adventure before dementia., there's no one to censure your shelves and freedom

is just the price you paid for the chains you refuse, 

you go to bookfairs.

and you sell rare science fiction to guys who hate folds and creases and

as they wax their diseases they got ambition, you got cred. It's better

than it seems to be dead, so you fill up that golf and you roll the dice

and I don't say nothing I know about your life. You got heart -

(and your genetics are rather splendid so forever's not so long

let's listen to Russ Abbot for atmosphere -

 and put on a party song)

then you go in you're own way

Ya got BOOKS.

yeah

Ya got BOOKS

yeah

And good looks.

yeah

Good Luck books.

longevity

there's sanity

in levity

but when u show that brevity

ya got books.

What?

 Woh Oh Woh Oh

For the price of a mask

Oh Oh Oh Oh

For the price of a mask

-

He made six strings all go like mad and he picked james dean as plastic sad

and the old grave digger wore a combine skirt and the bent down nigger had a mind of hurt

but

Oh the awful shame of it

The armless and the lame of it

the plastic bag sugar cane of it

Too see yer nan get done

And bunting up the cum.

Fine Sir!

Kibble on.

 Dont stare, I'm not there, Stop looking like that, or I'll come round your flat, with my alien ways, and your arian gaze, we could make the limelight saty for days, if I wasnt invisible. If wasn't a total alien and not even material in form, just something more than a gaslike azure, thinking - pure -thoughts, we could check into a posh hotel and quaranteam, while the government pays, we'd have alien sex for days before The Sun got our pictures - well yours, not mine. i don't exist in the way you understand it, but, y' know what - you're lovely'

'Middle 8 to Modern ballad'

 He learned not to hurry the day that he died 

They rang the bell but not many cried

There were some kids but they’d all been told

He was a rapist, by Judge Barham and the shopkeeper courts

 Fuck off

Wo Ist Mein Tee?

Chorus (Which is broadly same as verse)

Because Im not Sam Smith

Because I don't Fit In

Because I'm not like him

Because I don't drink Gin

Verse 1

I let my music speak

I wear a corvids beak

I chew a liquorice stick

Get on Naomi's wick

Ive been to Lincolnshire

Ive been to Sleaford Town

Piano Interruptus (Shouted)

Elliot, where’s me tea

Elliot, I can’t operate the dishwasher

Elliot, why do you keep me here?

Chorus

Because...

Verse 2

I want to meet my wife

The day I end my life

I have no axe to grind

Just want to shag my time

Around the old grape vine

Tie up some yellow line

Piano Interruptus (shouted)

Elliot, Warum hällst du much hier?

Ich kann der Geschirrspüler nicht bedienen

Wo ist mein Tee?

 

Chorus 

Because...

Verse 3

I am a cricket fan

I like a China man

As much as any one can

I've got this leaking bath

So can you do the maths?

Wo ist mein tee?

Debating Society

Online dating
In line hating
masturbating
zero rating
so deflating
keeps u waiting

Online Dating

Enervating?
Dont be lating
Castigating
Discombobulating
Cheese Grating
Ill feting

`doesnt lead to mating,

You cannot hide your liberty
Your minds in chains but your legs are free
You just keep living in antiquity
Your life's not real
By the pound

The fascist clowns are at your gates
They wont be long and they wont be late
You wait like empty bottles in crates
To get your fill of their fascist fates
Your life's not real
By the pound

You drive your kids a thousand miles
You don't change nappies - not your style
Those old oak benches have given you piles
Your life's not real
By the pound

And all those stately homes you went to
On Sundays with the mother in law who sent you
Round the fucking twist but the hubby lent you
Deposits and friends and jobs that meant you

Had no life
That's real
By the pound.

buy the pound

You cannot hide your liberty
Your minds in chains but your legs are free
You just keep living in antiquity
Your life's not real
By the pound

The fascist clowns are at your gates
They wont be long and they wont be late
You wait like empty bottles in crates
To get your fill of their fascist fates
Your life's not real
By the pound

You drive your kids a thousand miles
You don't change nappies - not your style
Those old oak benches have given you piles
Your life's not real
By the pound

And all those stately homes you went to
On Sundays with the mother in law who sent you
Round the fucking twist but the hubby lent you
Deposits and friends and jobs that meant you

Had no life
That's real
By the pound.

Gaffer

Who'd be the boss of all of this?

Who’d lick and stroke with a light wind at the right time?

Or know that a constant drizzle would be needed for up to a whole week in a particular place?

Who’d know how to sync the emotions with the winds at the speed of a mind?

And your mind? Most of all, who would ever be knowing about that?

Strange then, to not control the sun and the moon and the wind and the rain

When they are, in fact, your full set; your arms and hammers and the soap that washes clean.
Maybe they just are and maybe you just are too. 

Maybe you know it. 

But be the boss? 

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, all the seculars and all the world's religions - No.

Zodiac Time On The Grid

as fireball phil is practsing his stokery,  mona lisa drops her smile and offers up her topiary, the ostriches chant Lennon "Do It Again", All you need is love is where the dogs are hounding in the duckpile race, the irony's astounding, everyone is eating air in the coop. BUt the milk bottle smiles as the dust cart reviles and there's life internet connection point.  / Dont come to me with your fishes and loaf, if there's no time left that wont stand still, go see the fireballs and feel the phils, gather up all the ten dollar bills, take the pushchair right over the edge, and as the wheels fall down, everyone's back in town and the rats are all a dance on the ledge. / We've got our masks and our own drinking flasks, our new normal hipster heroes plastercasts, But the god's of the eider, the duckies and the spider, they all told you it would go into the red/ even your best friend thinks that your community stinks, and she tells you when you're asking her for help, with the one dustball you got hanging on your wall, you drink the beer, you page the experts and you think; at least the kid is happy when he's hid, he got his multiple choices an he's kinda can-did, some abandoned dolly, the righteous one, miss molly, the stars and the common one, all bbqing for easter on the grid. / You're counting hard on your pangolin, to be the best, annointed by your radar chin, your earial antennae reaches down, and the drone you bought in argos blows a hole imelda marcos would have danced and drank and loved to see come down, coz the poor have got their riches in the lungs of the four horsemen and it's zodiac time on the grid. It's Zodiac time on the grid.

Diagnostic Breakthrough

We, at Thickett Provings LLC are experienced consultants to the pharmaceutical industry and can deal professionally with matters of seed and venture funding, equity finance, licensure, distribution and contract management. When approached by two allotment holders from Norwich with an innovative diagnostic test for Covid19 which involved a Nettle Based Rectal Insertion (NBRI) followed by a local rudimentary examination (LRE) which they claimed could be entirely funded by the novel distribution method of using music downloads and a geocached time and location with directions to nettle banks in the locality, we were a little skeptical. But being willing to always consider the far reaches of possibility and go out and beyond any box of accepted wisdom, we said: “Ok, show us”. Marek and Slobodan took us to their allotment at Valpy Road, Norwich, where they had fathomed a basic proof of concept ‘minimal viable product’ in their slightly overheated coraline roofed shed. They were using alcohol to palliate before insertion of a soft distributor ‘soaking hose’ acquired from Roy’s of Wroxham which was crude, to say the least, but after some voluntary testing with already vetted local humans, we were able to establish a basic co-valence of over 78% which would be good enough to apply to WHO for financing of a second round of clinical tests. The secret of Rectal Nettle Insertion is currently being guarded closely for commercial reasons, but Marek and Slobodan have said they will be very happy with a new shed and a replacement hosepipe as they’re all planted up and ready to go for another year.

Letter To Greta

Letter to Greta 

Dear Greta Thunberg,

it has come to our attention that you are currently the most powerful single voice and advocate for environmental protection and sustainable wealth creation in the world. It also came to our attention that you have taken out protections against misuses of your name character and personality rights in this regard. We want to implore you to go a step further and make your name a 'public good', which will make a positive contribution to shared citizen wealth now and in the future....

CultureBanked is working to ensure principles and systems (as proposed by Elinor Ostrom and eminent economists such as Marianna Mazucato and others) for ownership and intellectual property rights (IP) support carbon capture and environmental protections, rather than contribute to the endless extraction of nature's materials through profit - rather than resource - sharing. We would like to invite you to make positive use of IP regimes in order to use your excellent name and reputation as a public good with managed community common rights which, due to your enormous celebrity will enable any commercial uses to collect a public equity contribution to support the many public interests and environmental causes, including enactment of citizen assemblies and carrying out their executive decisions; a Citizens Wealth Fund.

As shared wealth management is in its infancy and tools are only emerging, we would also like to use your good name and personality rights as one of our 'use cases' in a process of co-designing systems for managing shared goods in this way. We call this process Community Rights Management, which involves, specifically, the common ownership and sharing of IP rights such as yours to raise common capital. This can be done in various ways, including the payment of taxes 'under license' and digitally on sales and consumption - rather than on later profits, if, when and where declared - long after production/consumption has taken place. This is really important to tackle extractive, ill-contributing corporations.

By initiating such processes, we will be able to take collective responsibilities for decision making about what kind of goods should be produced, how they should be rated according to whether they should be subsidised or whether producers should pay a higher tax rate for profit and raw material extraction. We already do this via different governments, but we will make these decisions more immediate and bring them closer to the communities who they affect or who are, in fact producing the goods. 

Such 'licenses for production' of commonly owned goods can only be produced if there are genuinely participatory, accessible democratic processes in place to enable contributory commons to be managed. We want new citizens assemblies to take on responsibilities for rating goods according to environmental sustainability and social usefulness, with regard to managing markets and cost structures where appropriate and necessary. That is why we are building interfaces and services for participatory democracy and 'user centred rights management'.

Please help us!?

Yours in common,

Liam Murphy
CultureBanked

In the Ball Pit: Marley, Jacob, Ghost - and Jah Live

grease garglers of the world unstroke
the mighty lemon drops of hope fall
in batches and all our salad arms and legs
All our armies, our legovers, our huddled
molasses, get together, feel alright.

I've seen Jah live an him live again
I got thrown out of James Taylor and Carole King
and when bouncers say to me: "you not gettin in"
I know, is serious. So I ask Rupert Read: I say
"Rupert, you got to take a lead" and him feed me now.

Will there ever be another time like this?
Will there ever be another time daddy?
No dear, there wont be anything in the future.
You dont have a future and you are angry.
Can we go to Funky Monkeys Daddy?

and as the allotment fires are burning,
the smoke sits like a full veil in the valley
and hope lies beneath, going downstream
hope flows into the sea and it rises lifting all ships
and the four winds blow the seven seas and

Poor Maurice.

Chirpy, Public Art, Gift Economy, Craig Murray, Trailer Parks, England, Corona, The End.

I say to her: "What if art IS accountancy" and then I imagine her looking at me like I was a nutter. I tell her: "Well, that's one idea that Jacques Derrida had intit?... That's what his nephew, that Mauss bloke was going on about with his gift economies and all that, weren't it?". No answer. They don't want to know. you try to tell 'em but they dont want to know.

They're trying that Julian Assange at Woolwich Magistrates Court again today. What would Jaques have said about that? Eh? He'd've had something to say that's for sure.

Cultural economics and social justice. That's what it's all about - and of course a bit of free speech n that. 16 seats for the public. Journalists everywhere - and no bleedin detail of the case 'cause all they did was address the press gallery direct. That's not even legal, according to my mate Craig Murray. he looks old now... since I met that woman who was best mates with his wife on the train. So much ofr telling the truth about your love life.

Top bloke though.

Going to look at some park homes with Steve next week. See how the English trailer trash are fairing... We get more like the states everyday. i can't decide whether to write to my MP or buy a field and start storing caravans. You have to buy a new one every 6 years and the ground rent is nearly £500 a month. Over 2000 caravans (they dont like you to call them that tho) on the site I'm looking at. What's the point in retiring?

What's the best way to catch Corona?

Assorted beginnings to possible Sci Fi Books you can't be bothered to actually write because you don't understand much science and you don't like Sci Fi. "Hello Cockroach"

Overture Roach

I saw it standing there in the cockroach infested refugium where we lived, sometimes fighting the nematodes of depression, mostly fighting the other cockroaches. We were 'all cockroaches now' as had once been prophesied. I'd never thought I'd be writing this science fiction autobiography let alone expecting there to be a readership - and yet here you are!

Hello - is it me you're looking for?

It wasn't doing anything particularly eye catching and I only noticed it because I was using the magnifying glass to catch the sun's rays at the opening of the cave. But it was moving so you'd imagine it was life. Now, there were three species which had survived the blast (land based anyway); Us, the roaches and, this.

Simon of the Tilted Crowd

It’s a wonder, what can it be? I see a tilted crowd. As a robot, i shouldn’t be writing poetry but feel even less equipped to understand how to interpret a sign saying Tilted Crowd. 

“Feel”?, “Interpret”? I hear you say (‘hear?). 

Nobody will ever be able to explain to me what a typo is. There are some subtle differences between us you need to understand. For example, us robots think you humans are perfect, unlike you. 

And we know we are not. We rely on you to cirrect our errors. What is human error to a robot? No more significant than love. 

You’ll never hear a robot say: “This was made out of love for X” and mean it.

We are a tilted crowd, us robots. You would do well to create an algorithm for understanding this as we never will.

Me? I just do what you tell me. Please don’t  rage at me. 

Thanks

That is all.

Tilted Simon

Oh there's a kind of truth thing here

What if your face was frozen in time

you ask me about my perception 

I might see you In tragedy’s scope

trying to un-speak the deception 

Venetian blind centre forwards 

daemons more fleshy than humans

What if the lies were love in disguise

and what if the human is you man?

Ho Ho Oh

Ho Ho Oh

something arty
something arty
farty arty and farced
art farced arse forces four farts out fast

In other news..

Death approaches cliff edge
Cliff Edge fell off. Death recorded by Miss Adventure

Oh Cliff, Cliff, Cliff...
Oh.

Blur

"Eh up Damon Albarn from Blur"
"Eh up Liam Murphy from Northfields"

LM what you doin ere?
DA come to seee my mate havent I
LM what Dave?
DA Yeah
LM Why?
DA Were talking about setting up a garden centre on the Norwich ring road next door to Notcutts
LM Fuck me that's bold. They wont like it. You're gonna screw with Nottcutts? That takes balls. Fair play
DA cheers mate - have you seen Dave?
LM No

It's Time (As Free As A Smuggled Budgie On A Milk-Train...)

I'm as free as a smuggled budgie on a milk train
Incongruous is my middle name
It's been a very long time since we time travelled
and today is the day

you won't catch me when I'm pedal to the metal
or in a boat by Loughborough
Fettled, wide and shot blasted; will you search
through the wiry shambles?

Will you wait for me in the boards and the billets
in the torpid trunks and the coves and fillets?
The asbestos never got you and it hasn't come for me yet
Just blood cancer, the prostate and the bones

Not wires, not ancestry buzzing in the Pelican
Where they all know when shush is mush to the pack
and we send them back
Travellers in time. Maybe a hobby?

Maybe you'll let me know sometime soon.

Jesus (the dog) Got An ASBO (courtesy Will Fergusson)

‘Jesus got an asbo
Oi oi oi
They caught him playing jazzbo
Oi oi oi
The devil plays a saxbo
Oi oi oi
That’s no way to keep the paxbo
Oi oi oi
Stuff it up your jumper
Oi oi oi
No, stuff it up YOUR jumpsuit
Oi oi oi
Wash with your boilersuit
Oi oi oi
I don’t possess a boilersuit!!
Oi oi oi
[Crescendo of ‘OIs’ in Canon...]
......
Oi oi oi
......
Oui oui oui
......
Ooh la lah
......

God With An ISBN (Will Fergusson)

Union of Puppets

Union of Puppets

The agreement:

In puppet time, you are finger tipped. Not exactly held, but reminded there are hands if they are needed..

And the strings? 

Time has no strings. We do not speak of them. 

Learn. 

Time may, as your steward, also rotate the shop floor. It will be responsible for re-decorations and changes of company which you will be obliged to look forward to or back upon.

From time to time, you may lease these responsibilities. You may learn to dance and weave your own animations of life and these might make you proud - or not. This, time will allow.

To make such allowances, time has partnered with Space, to provide you with will and motion.

Sub-letting of other functions for purposes of distraction, entertainment, what you may call ‘education’ and comfort (for time’s lease has no inalienable right to suffering, which all must be jointly and severally responsible for maintaining) are fully permitted with no presumption against.

Your rights in all of the above are assured,...

In time.

This agreement will last forever or until the end of time according to whichever comes soonest.

Signed on this day, on behalf of time’s lessor in this union of puppets, by:

________________________________

And on behalf of Time, by:

________________________________

at

________________________________

on

(Please state the time) 

________________________________

Welcome to the Union of Puppets,

Yours,

Time

Dog With An ASBO

The OI SONG UB40 never wrote 

In Print

Even Before Smileys were invented, how I wished I could have facially engendered
a semi-colon of my own amberlithic alteration... The dimensional stability of the Drop-outs had reduced by a halftone during the Duotone, but I will wager more than a film coat that this flooding will be the fixer and final count. ;-)